All-American Drinking and Devouring

This past weekend saw the advent of homemade American classics, essentially on the fly. Pretty exciting stuff starting with freshly steamed clams in a white wine & butter sauce with shallots and carrots. Colleen got them via FreshDirect for what sounds to be a steal, and Scott literally made them in two-hundred seconds.

Then I made the homemade chili I've been concocting for over a week in my brain: red kidney beans; pinto beans; sauteed beef chuck (far superior to meatless/ground beef/chicken chilis) with sea salt, garlic, onion, cumin, and red chili powder; sauteed red and green bell peppers, a jalapeno, and more garlic; and finally a can of green chiles, two cans of fire-roasted & diced tomatoes; topped off with more cumin, chili powder, and a few hours on the stove. Topped off with shredded cheddar and crusty breads, appropriately coupled with cold beers, Saturday night never induced sleep better.

Sunday was Scott's birthday and we had biscuits, homemade creamy gravy with spicy sausage, and fluffly, scrambled eggs for breakfast. Sometime down the line after "The Banquet Beers," Scott made buffalo wings paired with crisp carrot and celery sticks.

Halloween began early with viewings of Silence..., The Shining, Scream and CW's roasted pumpkin seeds from the jack-o-lantern we welcomed into the abode.

Last Night's [Sex] Dream

I was asked by the F.B.I. to go undercover and help them out with some heavy mafia shit in the tiny town of Las Vegas, NV.

It started with me driving [in the style of Sega's 1980's arcade classic, Out Run] my much older dad around in my cool, red covertible and dropping him off at the DMV or the clinic. Something not fun. He had a cane and was balding.

So I go to pull the job in some casinos and just as shit is hitting the proverbial fan and I'm being followed by gangsters and I'm running around with some pretty Latina, I realize that I am no other than a young Elvis Presley.

I very rarely dream in celebrity.

So there I am, on the brink of intel and espionage and the chase, getting down with some hot chick.

All in all, it was a pretty awesome dream.

Stache, Chest-hair, and short-shorts. Done and done.

Why, hello Birdie!

My first friend

was a terrier-mutt named Lady. She was white with brown spots.

She was the brattiest dog I've ever known. She would wrassle me down, me being half her size, ripping off my diaper and stealing my socks. Leaving me naked and crying. She would actually feel bad, I suppose, because she would bring me back my socks.

She made me laugh and we played together too. In fact, there's some photos some where of us playing together in Hawai'i, me laughing, having a time. Or running around on the countryside.

We had to give her up when we left for the states. I was four.

AAAAAANnnnd I'm drunk-blogging.

A few things about Halloween...

It's my favoritist holiday, before T-Gives, before X-mas, and before Boxing Day. Since I'm still deciding on a butole cotume (loosely translated as, "Butt-hole Costume"), I'll impart my Amazon DVD wish list that I will no doubt order @ next payday:

1. The Witches: That part where the little girl disappears in the painting is absolutely terrifying. So is Angelica Houston. And all the kids smell like dog poop!
2. A Nightmare on Elm Street 1-4 Box-set: The first one...is well, really scary and fucked up. Dream Warriors is just fun and awesome.
3. Beetlejuice: I sort of have always had a tiny crush on Catherine O'Hara. Weird, right?
4. The Others: exceptionally suspenseful film-making. Colleen should be that crazy mom for H-ween. But then she'd just look like Colleen wearing dress, circa 1947.
5. Young Frankenstein: I should be quarantined on H-ween for not owning this cinematic work of absolute genius and fright, i.e. best part being when Madeline Kahn shimmys into her honeymoon quarters.
6. Starter for 10: probably the [2nd] best British film I've ever seen. Its about a quiz show and is soundtracked by the Cure, for crissakes!
7. Billy Elliot: this is a HILARIOUS idea for a costume...no one would get it except 50+ yr. old freakazoids and mid-western women who vacationed to Broadway this past year.

Me is Colleen; Me is re-caffienated

Joe: hahahahahahahahah
its so much more exciting than spanish
YEAH
plus i know if i learnt it, it would piss off my fellow spic
spics get all up in yo face bout that shit
esp in NM
me: about Italian?
they get mad about Italian.
sigh.
Joe: IM ALL, IMA DO WHAT I WANT TO DO
me: what is wrong with people
Joe: YEAH
EVERYONE thinks i should learn spanish
no
everyone that needs to know it already does
so if im going to spend my precious time learning something new
its going to be about enhancing my sex life
i.e. italian
and you can publish this to the world wide web
because i think its both funny and true
me: oh, ok
let me do that
Joe: your coffee is strong like a bull dyke's fiancee
me: fabulous

Joe: larry david?
me: what
what?
Joe: dinner
hate
do you know gavin mcinnes?